#NewThisDay Writing From My Photo Stream
An alarm is set for waking into this day of adventure. We plan to catch the ferry at 7 am from Saint-Francois, Quadaloupe, to the island Marie-Gallante where we will spend the day sightseeing, hiking, swimming and enjoying a French restaurant for lunch on a beach in Capesterre overlooking the turquoise lagoon. Also, a nap in the shade before returning to the ferry in Saint-Louis.
The alarm. Waking me from a dream - a sweet, satisfying, deeply moving dream; one of those dreams that arrives as a gift, churning with raw emotion – the sense of having truly experienced the illusion: my parents, alive, together.
The timing of their dementia states overlapping in the dream - so they are vulnerable and lost concurrently. It's unclear how much they remember about their fifty-four year relationship. But, here they are in their eighties, rescued from oblivion, living side by side in twin beds in a wonderful nursing home where they are being completely cared for. My mother's hair has been styled - she looks so pretty!
My brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles, we are all gathered for a funeral, but whose? And there is so much happiness, not grief! Because they are finally together again. And, although they are not able to care for each other, (so there is no conflict, no inadequacies or resentments between them), instead, they are being cared for together. And we, their children, no longer need to care for them. This is completion: they are together, and they are being cared for in their vulnerability by this competent staff. And my mother - I haven't realized how much I've missed her, and what a happy relief it is to see her with her pretty hair. How much I've missed her after all.
I wake churning with gratitude and satisfaction and love. A miraculous acquittal, freedom from guilt.
All photos and text copyright Kelly DuMar 2017